I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize