Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize
