Texts From Last Night

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  (804): View more from Virginia

  So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.

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  (804): So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets. http://tfl.nu/c2eo
  Replies (30) Good night (612) Bad night (1023) Order T-Shirt
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid

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  (215): So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling (215): on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid http://tfl.nu/4rn1
  Replies (54) Good night (1963) Bad night (1326)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.

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  (214): just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that. http://tfl.nu/pf1d
  Replies (18) Good night (549) Bad night (3979) Order T-Shirt
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  (619): View more from California

  I'm passing your future prison.

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  (619): I'm passing your future prison. http://tfl.nu/j7g6
  Replies (15) Good night (4219) Bad night (882) Order T-Shirt
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  (310): View more from California

  it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.

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  (310): it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls. http://tfl.nu/2hrl
  Replies (30) Good night (10339) Bad night (805) Order T-Shirt
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  (219): View more from Indiana

  By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone

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  (219): By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone http://tfl.nu/czmq
  Replies (8) Good night (3961) Bad night (790) Order T-Shirt
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  (660): View more from Missouri

  We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out

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  (660): We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out http://tfl.nu/p80s
  Replies (3) Good night (5162) Bad night (1008) Order T-Shirt
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  (804): View more from Virginia

  I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.

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  (804): I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you. http://tfl.nu/q9i5
  Replies (8) Good night (1108) Bad night (2793) Order T-Shirt
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  All my credit cards need to be pressure washed

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  (617): All my credit cards need to be pressure washed http://tfl.nu/kgeq
  Replies (5) Good night (965) Bad night (787) Order T-Shirt
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.

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  (720): I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer. http://tfl.nu/jm0p
  Replies (7) Good night (370) Bad night (1075) Order T-Shirt
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down

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  (775): I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down http://tfl.nu/2bqj
  Replies (2) Good night (726) Bad night (363) Order T-Shirt
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  (316): View more from Kansas

  She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.

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  (316): She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public. http://tfl.nu/5b68
  Replies (3) Good night (1211) Bad night (261)
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  (763): View more from Minnesota

  I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween

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  (763): I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween http://tfl.nu/seas
  Replies (3) Good night (683) Bad night (193) Order T-Shirt
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway

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  (330): Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway http://tfl.nu/794f
  Replies (5) Good night (1000) Bad night (184) Order T-Shirt
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  (501): View more from Arkansas

  So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring

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  (501): So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring http://tfl.nu/8ezz
  Replies (4) Good night (614) Bad night (202) Order T-Shirt

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