Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
