At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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