I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
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