You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
