She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
We have started to decorate penises.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
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