6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
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