just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Randomize
