His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
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