I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
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