honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
