I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
If I die, sorry about rent.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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