you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
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