I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
How's work?
Spinning.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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