Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize