At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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