doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Randomize
