Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
