im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
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just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
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