So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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