sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize
