I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
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