She's JV to your varsity
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Randomize
