it was like his penis was on wheels.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Randomize
