What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
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It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
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Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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