Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Randomize
