ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Randomize