question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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