did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
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