Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
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