Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Randomize
