Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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