I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
He did a backflip because drugs
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
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