I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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