While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Randomize
