Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
