Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize