you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
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