Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
I wanna passion pit in your ass
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Randomize
