if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
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