I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize
