Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
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