Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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