You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
Randomize