3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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