i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
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