Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize