If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
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