just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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