did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Best friends brother. Beat that.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Randomize